Selected Comments from Amazon's Oscar Mayer Beef Bologna, 8 oz. Page:
I found this while researching for the guy who wants to sell bologna out of his home.
Being not only a agoraphobic but a hemophiliac, you can imagine how difficult my life is. 20 years ago I became a shut in and the most painful part of my existance was my inability to recieve fresh beef bologna. Imagine my glee at hearing the news that the delicate lunchmeat that had once been so readily available to my distinct palate was no longer going to be merely a dream!
My 14 cats and I have cocktail partys all the time
and then I will enter my bathtub and delight in the Bologna all over my body. Slick... slimy... bologna... mmmmm....
one thing I did not realize when I purchased this item is that each slice of beef bologna is uniquely crafted to sleeve an undersized man's penis.
ok lemme start out with some background info on myself. I am a 42 year old pigmy living in louisiana, and have 4 illegitimate children by three different women, and this amounts to allot of money in support payments. I recently hired a lawyer to work out my payments with my ex-lovers. The deal that was reached is i have to feed all my kids and nothing more, their mothers pay for their clothes and everything else. This agreement allowed me to save a whole bunch of money because i recently just had 250 packages of this delicious bologna sent to my house. It has 20 slices per package and i told their mothers to cut up a slice into three pieces, one for each meal. Seeing as each package will feed one of my kids for 20 days i have already had enough money to start up an expensive meth habit that has made my life full again. I no longer feel lost in life. Once again i have a purpose in life. havent just been givin the bologna away though, i have been enjoying it also. Since i have been eatin this stuff my ghonorrea has cleared up, and my eyesight is much better now too. Thank you amazon and oscar maier, you have saved my life. Now I have to go to U P S to send out my monthly shipments of bologna to my kids. Now if i could re-up on metamphetamine i would be set.
Being not only a agoraphobic but a hemophiliac, you can imagine how difficult my life is. 20 years ago I became a shut in and the most painful part of my existance was my inability to recieve fresh beef bologna. Imagine my glee at hearing the news that the delicate lunchmeat that had once been so readily available to my distinct palate was no longer going to be merely a dream!
My 14 cats and I have cocktail partys all the time
and then I will enter my bathtub and delight in the Bologna all over my body. Slick... slimy... bologna... mmmmm....
one thing I did not realize when I purchased this item is that each slice of beef bologna is uniquely crafted to sleeve an undersized man's penis.
ok lemme start out with some background info on myself. I am a 42 year old pigmy living in louisiana, and have 4 illegitimate children by three different women, and this amounts to allot of money in support payments. I recently hired a lawyer to work out my payments with my ex-lovers. The deal that was reached is i have to feed all my kids and nothing more, their mothers pay for their clothes and everything else. This agreement allowed me to save a whole bunch of money because i recently just had 250 packages of this delicious bologna sent to my house. It has 20 slices per package and i told their mothers to cut up a slice into three pieces, one for each meal. Seeing as each package will feed one of my kids for 20 days i have already had enough money to start up an expensive meth habit that has made my life full again. I no longer feel lost in life. Once again i have a purpose in life. havent just been givin the bologna away though, i have been enjoying it also. Since i have been eatin this stuff my ghonorrea has cleared up, and my eyesight is much better now too. Thank you amazon and oscar maier, you have saved my life. Now I have to go to U P S to send out my monthly shipments of bologna to my kids. Now if i could re-up on metamphetamine i would be set.
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