Monday, September 01, 2008
Earthbound Replay: The First Twenty Minutes
Dave's post about bizarro Giygas theories got me thinking last week: hey, it's been a while since I played that game. And the three day weekend here had me thinking: hey, it'd be much more fun to sit around tap-tap-tapping into a game emulator than to sit around tap-tap-tapping into an extended work of writing or clean-clean-cleaning the apartment. Or register-register-registering my junked out car.

If you played Earthbound back in the days of hamburger comics and trips to the Baptist church and of knocking out entire 24-packs of Mountain Dew in a single evening, your dominant impression of the game was probably that it was damn goofy. Somehow this detail slipped into the dust behind my brain and so I was surprised, in the first battle after the meteor strikes in the mountains, to have a pastry stolen from me by an enemy.


And of course you're fighting a spiteful crow because the game's primary enemy, Giygas, has turned the animals of the world against you. After you bludgeon them with your cracked bat, they don't die, but they do become tame again.

After throttling a few tiny woodland creatures, you finally make your way to a hilltop, only to be approached by a bee from the future and a mysterious pervert outside the shack where he lives alone. What does he have to say to you?


But--but what could he mean by that? After noticing the friends tagging along with you, he seems reluctant to say.

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