Various words for penis are discussed in this post

I just spoke with a woman who could not fathom that my last name was spelled like the penises. This took place on the phone.

"Could you say that again?"

"Dicks."

"With an X?"

"Cks.

"Sorry, I'm having trouble with the Dicks in here." (She truly said this.) "You said that's Dix?"

After that the conversation stopped being hilarious.

I'm being driven insane by the bureaucracy that keeps us from graduating, and one of my students just suffered. He hasn't shown up in almost six weeks and I was supposed to meet with him today to discuss options but instead I just sent him a damning email. Why? Because I have to crawl around my apartment hunting for yet another carbon copy of some form to give the English Department.

Agh going insane.

Maybe this is a strange time to tell you this, but Sarah and I are moving across the country, to America's wang. I'll let you figure out where that is.