Selling grades for CASH!

Tim should give those little plagerists the option to buy their grades. That would teach them a truely valuable lesson about how the world works. If you can't cheat, bribe.

Lately, every paycheck I get feels like a bribe. These temp agencies keep placing me in various levels of cube hell and they'll say "If you can stand to work here we'll pay you a whole twelve dollars and fifty cents an hour!" Yes, that is what my dignity is worth.

Right now I'm sitting inside a building that looks sort of like the fortress of solitude meets the Halo 3 warehouse map. I sit right where the brute shot spawns in a little cube calling every Pizza Hut and Piggly Wiggly in Illinois that hasn't paid the gas bill. It sucks, but it sucks just a little bit less than last week when I was working for a trucking brokerage calling old grizzled truckers and asking if they could fax me some paperwork. "I'll fax it right up yer ass if you call me again fucker!"

You call um fucker they'll take you right off their list.

I have learned an interesting fact about collectors: They have their own language. Its sort of like leet only they use accounting jargon instead of computer jargon. Such as:

wta said will call back-took 800 nmbr and hu wthout taking acct nmr ss

Or this:

lm on a/p v/m-mentioned cc/cbp

How about this one:

dscvd #4dwight is 414 384 8120 hws wndrg rnd smwr 4gt to lv cnct nfo

And another:

lm4teh gd doc h/ws drlln

and another:

tt chem lab rep sd Ed Lucas retired she ref me to ap dnky shw inv nf & cn't ││bfxd bcz ap 2stpd 2yz fxmchn

and my favorite:

current bchs!

Dave, if this cartooning thing doesn't work out, I could probably get you a job here. Just don't forget to AFC!