Be the Star You Are
Well, it finally came in. I have to write an occupational outlook report for someone who wants to be a DJ/Karaoke Star! Ryan, when you were planning on getting a karaoke machine…this is something you have to schmooze your way into, right? Like, “hey, want me to come run some karaoke at your bar?” And do you know how much machines are?
I’ll cite you in the Resources page as R. MacDonut.
Of the clan MacDonut.
I saw the Al,yssa ghost again last night. I’ve seen her twice in Ankeny and once in Albia…here are the three episodes, recounted for your spooktacular pleasure. Becauase today through Sunday night is Spirits Weekend.
1)Alyssa and I are staying at my parents’ house in Albia. We’re still dating but for the sake of my parents Alyssa is upstairs in my room and I am on that couch in the living room, the Bil-eating couch. I wake up at something like four and Alyssa is downstairs, is standing over me next to the couch. It’s so dark that all I can see is the dark fall of her hair, the silhouette of her body. Then she turns and walks across the room and fades until she’s gone. At this point I’m telling myself it was a sleep phenomenon but I’m also remembering how every member of my family claims to have seen multiple paranormal entities in this house, in this living room specifically. Thankfully I’m tired enough that skepticism wins out.
2)Just after Alyssa and I break up: I’m sleeping on the floor in the living room. The kitchen light is on because if I don’t leave the kitchen light on something out of the X-Files will surely eat my face. I’m falling asleep and Alyssa steps out of the bedroom, looks at me for a while—it’s too dark really to see her face—and then slips into the bathroom and shuts the door. I get up and walk over, knock on the door, say her name. Nothing, so I try it again. Then I finally open the bedroom door and Alyssa groggily sits up and gives me the look that says “what the fuck are you doing?” She denies having been to the bathroom, and was obviously asleep.
3)This morning: I wake up and Alyssa is kneeling in bed. She’s all dark, a silhouette, and something’s wrong with her head. It’s too long, I think, the hair stretched out, the neck stretched out, and I notice that she’s deformed, and then I notice that I can’t see the face, and I stand up and then, after a second, the image disappears and Alyssa, the real Alyssa, is still asleep.
Well, there you go. These are my hauntings by the Alyssa ghost.
Here’s what you can look forward to if you do business in Asia.
New! Which karaoke star is sexist?! I side with Ron Diamond or Judy, who looks like a fat/hick/pregnant Heather. Sort of. If you squint...and then the wrestling game sort of looks real...
I’ll cite you in the Resources page as R. MacDonut.
Of the clan MacDonut.
I saw the Al,yssa ghost again last night. I’ve seen her twice in Ankeny and once in Albia…here are the three episodes, recounted for your spooktacular pleasure. Becauase today through Sunday night is Spirits Weekend.
1)Alyssa and I are staying at my parents’ house in Albia. We’re still dating but for the sake of my parents Alyssa is upstairs in my room and I am on that couch in the living room, the Bil-eating couch. I wake up at something like four and Alyssa is downstairs, is standing over me next to the couch. It’s so dark that all I can see is the dark fall of her hair, the silhouette of her body. Then she turns and walks across the room and fades until she’s gone. At this point I’m telling myself it was a sleep phenomenon but I’m also remembering how every member of my family claims to have seen multiple paranormal entities in this house, in this living room specifically. Thankfully I’m tired enough that skepticism wins out.
2)Just after Alyssa and I break up: I’m sleeping on the floor in the living room. The kitchen light is on because if I don’t leave the kitchen light on something out of the X-Files will surely eat my face. I’m falling asleep and Alyssa steps out of the bedroom, looks at me for a while—it’s too dark really to see her face—and then slips into the bathroom and shuts the door. I get up and walk over, knock on the door, say her name. Nothing, so I try it again. Then I finally open the bedroom door and Alyssa groggily sits up and gives me the look that says “what the fuck are you doing?” She denies having been to the bathroom, and was obviously asleep.
3)This morning: I wake up and Alyssa is kneeling in bed. She’s all dark, a silhouette, and something’s wrong with her head. It’s too long, I think, the hair stretched out, the neck stretched out, and I notice that she’s deformed, and then I notice that I can’t see the face, and I stand up and then, after a second, the image disappears and Alyssa, the real Alyssa, is still asleep.
Well, there you go. These are my hauntings by the Alyssa ghost.
Here’s what you can look forward to if you do business in Asia.
New! Which karaoke star is sexist?! I side with Ron Diamond or Judy, who looks like a fat/hick/pregnant Heather. Sort of. If you squint...and then the wrestling game sort of looks real...
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