Wednesday, May 19, 2004
It only takes about 20 minutes to paddle a canoe from Australia to China
Hey Timmah! I'm planning on calling Donna tonight after work and requesting a meeting either friday evening or saturday morning. Sound good, n'est pas? Also, I'm guessing the bookstore job you mentioned in your previous post was the thing at half-price books. If so, get yer butt up here cause the ad I saw said you need to apply mon-weds. Today, if I am not mistaken, is weds. So go apply! What else do you have to do?

I'll be home again this weekend, if anyone is going to be around. I'm supposed to do something with Molly at some point, but I'm sure there will be much time aside from that. I guess I also have to go to graduation...but that'll be short. It'll feel long, but I think it only last a couple hours. I hear tell that my lost Xbox controller is being held at the agertment. I wouldn't mind schooling him at halo if any of you would like to join.

So I had this really fucked up dream last night. I lived in northern Australia on the beach. I had my own little dock jutting out into the ocean and a canoe and a beach house and a wife, or girlfriend, or live-in fuckbuddy or something like that. Anyway, the ocean was pretty calm considering that it was the ocean. It looked more like a really big, calm lake. So in the dream I'm talking to my wife/girlfriend/fuckbuddy and she leaves. I'm not sure why she left, I probably said something dumb to her. So she leaves and I decide I'm going to walk to the end of my little dock and get in my little canoe and start paddling. I decide I'm going to paddle to China. I found out something very interesting about the distance between Northern Austrailia and Southern China: the map has been lieing, they aren't that far apart. Either that or I am a mad paddling master, cause it only took me like 20 mins dream time to paddle to China. And I'll tell you something else that I learned about China: The Chinese all speak english and look suspiciously like Americans. But they still don't like us. The Chinese were no fun, so I hopped back in my canoe and decided to paddle over to Russia. The reason I chose Russia was because that was the only other piece of land I could see from China. Russia was a lot different from China, they didn't speak English, and they all wore those funny furry caps. I got out of my canoe and walked up the stone steps to Moscow, which looked suspiciously like downtown Des Moines. The people in Moscow were really poor, and apparently I looked really rich because they kept saying things in Russian and pointing at me. I knew it was because they were poor and I was rich to them. I started to feel really uncomfortable and started to turn to leave when one of them walked up to me, looking very kind, and handed me a sheet of paper. I had a hard time reading it (cause I guess you use different sides of your brain to read and dream or something) but I tried really hard and I was able to make out enough of it to know what it meant. Once I realized what it meant I knew that it was very important and that I needed to remember whatever it was. And, of course, for all the vivid details of the dream I can't remember what the fuck the message was. Whatever it was, I decided that it would be best if I returned to Australia. So I went back down to my little canoe and started paddling back to Australia. I wasn't sure exactly where it was, but I started paddling southeast-ish. It started to get dark and I still couldn't see Australia. I could still see China and Russian though. They were lit up in the darkness. I also became aware of a dozen or so big battleships in the ocean with me. I started to become afraid, because I thought they would mistake me for a terrorist in my little canoe and blast me out of the water. Then I stopped paddling. It was really dark and I wasn't sure where Australia was. I decided that it might be better if the battlships just shot me. I was just sitting there in my canoe, with my head in my hands, waiting for death. Then I woke up.

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