Meow. I'd Sell You Out.

Season's Greetings for your ass!
---David Wells

David Wells just showed up and started gibbering about Narnia, and the scene where the kid sells his family out for Turkish Delight. Turkish Delight, as detailed by Dave and this article, is disgusting. This lead to a discussion on what we would sell all of you out for. So:

David: I would sell you out for a brand new Beemer equipped with active camo and a stick shift. It would need a soda dispenser somewhere on the dashboard, as well as a hookup for my broken, run-over and snow-dripping ipod video (thanks, Ryan).

Andy: I would divulge your location and weaknesses to the Mormon inquisition in exchange for a refrigerated semi trailer of

1) Killian's

2) Beck's Dark

3) Bacardi Select

or

4) Jack Daniel's

Wes: A couple twinkies.

Kelly: The same.

Kevin: A time-traveling pirate galleon.

Cricket: A main-character voice roll in Halo 3.

Amish: Relief from that painfull rash I picked up from your whore grandmother.

Josh: A bunch of cheetahs tethered to a sled, and a cheetah whip. This would be a cool time-traveling vehicle too.

Bil: I would never sell you out.

Karl: A warehouse of Zima.

Kenny: A Super Monkey Ball rematch against Martin.