Batman Begins and Katie Holme's Sanity Ends

Batman Begins was a really good movie overall. It had a good story, believable characters, and some really kickass action sequences. All that was great but what does any good Batman movie need, aside from the story and the ass kicking? A hot, bat-love interest. Batman has rubbed wings with such hotties as Heather Locklear, Michelle Pfeiffer, and Nicole Kidman; so naturally the new movie is going to have to deliver equal or greater hotness to compete.

At first glance it appears that they've succeeded in doing that with the addition of Katie Holmes. She is hot, after all, but there's just one little problem: SHE'S BECOME TOM CRUISE'S ZOMBIE LOVE SLAVE! And that is enough to put a blemish on the face of Batman Begins.

Don't believe me about the 'zombie love slave' business? Read this. Cruise used his Scientology brainwashing masters to change sweet little Holmes into his own personal Scientology Stepford Wife! Oh! It just occurred to me! Part of the Batman Begins story involves a mind-altering chemical that makes it's victims go insane. In the movie, Holmes is exposed to this chemical. Coincidence? I think not!

Why would Tom want to brainwash Holmes? Let's face it, Tom's image as an ultra-weird, new age voodoo, priest of Scientology, homosexual hasn't really done him any favors. It would take a shining star like Holmes to polish up less-than-favorable appearance. What's more is that the Scientology gurus would have a lot to gain from a polished Cruise, so they would be eager to lend a hypnotic hand.

The Scientologists must be stopped.