The evening before Thanksgiving Sarah and I trotted down to Publix, which I just remembered you freezies (as everyone down here refers to Midwesterners) may not recognize as the local grocery chain, to acquire food for the holiday. Previously we had planned to order a pizza but then at the last minute decided to go traditional, sort of. While Sarah shopped for turkey burger buns I went into the bathroom to sneeze profusely. After I blew my nose (and seeing that phrase there, "blew my nose," freaks me out; is that not a bizarre idiom?) whoever was in the little grocery store bathroom stall started squirming around. Commenting on the odor of his own bowel movement. I know that's you, Nathan, he said. I can tell by your nose. When I responded only by washing my hands and opening the door, he said this, very quietly: aww shit.
The next day we made lunch. Here's one recipe for you. It occurred to me just now that you could make this for Halloween and call it a Busted Head.
YOU'LL NEED: an acorn squash. Some bacon, again. An apple.
YOU'LL DO THIS: Bake the squash, halved, at 375 for about a half hour. Up on top, in a skillet, prepare the chopped bacon, then add chopped apples. Fill the halved squash with this mix, then bake for another fifteen minutes. Feed a little bit of the bacon to your cat, who's been staring silently up at you this entire time.
(I got this recipe from the NYT, which hosts a picture of the (Platonic ideal of the) final product:
http://www.nytimes.com/slideshow/2009/11/19/dining/20091120-tgivingrecipe-slideshow_19.html
If you don't want to click the link, just remember it's done when it looks like you sawed someone's skull in half and tossed it in the oven.
. . .
Do you remember "The Rocking Horse Winner?" I will totally recommend it. But beware; the recommendation is tempered by the qualification that I haven't read it since high school sophomore year study hall.
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