Biggest Blizzard of the Century?! LETS ORDER PIZZA DELIVERY!

How coincidental that I have a story about pizza creating employment. But mines not as heart warming as our dear Hobbit's is. Good fucking lord. Tonite was my first nite of delivery driving. Ok not too bad..its only a 10 block radius. OH wait. Mr. Common Sence took a nap. Denver has bigass city blocks. And to top it all off...we wer expecting a foot and more of snow by tomorrow morning. And when does it start? When Im driving. There must be some old wive's tale that sez "If theres a foot of snow on the ground then it must be time to order pizza delivered." Fucking old wives and their tales.The first delivery was bad to begin with cuz who ever took the order messed up the delivery. I had to return to home base from across town to correct the error (the ticket said 5245 and the actual address was 2645...HOW THE FUCK IS THAT A MINOR MISTAKE?!). It turned out ok cuz the lady gave me a TEN DOLLAR TIP. I asked her if that was right and she smiled and said that it wasnt my fault and it worked out the pizza was 30 mins late. Then next delivery was on a buttfuck backwater "Excordinant" side street aply named like a road with a similar address. I spent 45 lookin for it...called the guy...went back for 30...only to have him cancel it and say that his kids didnt want pizza afterall and an apology. This was in the blizzard. The last delivery was when the snow was coming down like Jews from a cattle car (...ok that was tasteless). I had to go to the rich part of town...the part that the road ends and the assfuck rich blokes yards overenchroach and they have an entire street to call their own and make up for their small penises...ANYWAY i went to a rich fuck's house. Easy to find. He got 60 dollas in pizza and then he gives me 2 god damn dollars--one as wrinkley as senior members of Amish's family and the other torn like a rage rocker's emotions. UGH! To top it off the snow was blocking a ONE WAY sign and i went down it and got a chorus of horns honking and breaking. I recovered...went back to base...and washed dishes and stuff for the rest of my shift. So...for almost dying, getting lost, and being snuffed by aristocarcy, i made 12 dollars and reak of spices. FUCK EMPLOYMENT. . . for the most part.