Roads
Where we are going, we don't need roads.
Thursday, February 26, 2009
Wednesday, February 25, 2009
The worst album covers . . .
EVER ! ! !
I think they are actually the most awesomest album covers ever.
Sarah, if you were wondering what that girl at Wells Fargo looked like --^
I didn't know Colonel Sanders had a band !?
Tuesday, February 24, 2009
Capcom's big announcment
How lame was that crap. I was all excited that they were going to announce something that was going to blow my mind and we end up with a Lost Planet 2 announcement. I played the first game a bit. It was OK but nothing to write home about, and most certainly not as big a deal as Capcom wants me to believe it is. How about MVC 3 that would be an announcement worthy of that much fanfare.
Thursday, February 19, 2009
I'm 30
Man, that's old. That's crazy old.
That's you kids get off my lawn old.
Oh well. Hey, here's something cool.
Discuss that instead of my age.
That's you kids get off my lawn old.
Oh well. Hey, here's something cool.
Discuss that instead of my age.
I've been thinking about buying a rifle.
I've been thinking about buying a rifle.
I'm not alone, considering the number of background checks performed over the past few months, there seems to have been rise in gun sales. And people in Forida are apparently stocking up on bullets because there is a shortage of bullets in Flordia stores.
Why the sudden gun lust?
Maybe because we have a new president who is concerned about gun violence.
Maybe beause the economy is bad, getting worse, and they fear they may have to defend their property against desperate hobos.
Or maybe there is revolution in the air.
What do we do when the government takes 6.6% of our wages and hands it over to the same people who tried to sell us refinanced mortgages at 30% interest? Do we vote for the democrat who is going to increase spending and make the government bigger and probably can't fix anything, or the republican who is going to cut taxes, increase spending and also can't fix anything?
Are we supposed to sit back and laugh, or watch in horror as the people we voted for agree to spend a trillion dollars of our money and probably our children's money, on a bill most of them haven't even read? Do we write very serious blog posts about how concerned we are and hope someone is listening?
What do we do if they decide they need 10.6% of our wages because half the country is out of work and the government can't function without jacking up taxes? Do the patriotic thing, and sacrifice our wages for the good of the republic that already flushed our money down the crapper twice?
What the fuck are we supposed to do? We already voted. What else can we do?
We could storm the capitol.
I know that sounds crazy, but should it? Our country was founded by people who were sick of being taxed by a bunch of assholes who didn't give a shit about their well being. At what point should the poor people of this country consider revolt against the rich assholes who don't care about us? Who, in fact, seem much more concerned with keeping us quiet and controlled than making us prosperous.
At what point would you consider buying a rifle?
Some of you are probably thinking, "NEVER! What do you think I am, suicidal? The government has tanks and jeeps and bombs of every size. We've already let the governemnt control an army too powerful for the people of this country to stop it."
That's true, maybe any revolution against a modern government could only end in failure. We are absolutely at the mercy of the governemnt.
Man, forget the rifle, I'm moving to Ireland.
I'm not alone, considering the number of background checks performed over the past few months, there seems to have been rise in gun sales. And people in Forida are apparently stocking up on bullets because there is a shortage of bullets in Flordia stores.
Why the sudden gun lust?
Maybe because we have a new president who is concerned about gun violence.
Maybe beause the economy is bad, getting worse, and they fear they may have to defend their property against desperate hobos.
Or maybe there is revolution in the air.
What do we do when the government takes 6.6% of our wages and hands it over to the same people who tried to sell us refinanced mortgages at 30% interest? Do we vote for the democrat who is going to increase spending and make the government bigger and probably can't fix anything, or the republican who is going to cut taxes, increase spending and also can't fix anything?
Are we supposed to sit back and laugh, or watch in horror as the people we voted for agree to spend a trillion dollars of our money and probably our children's money, on a bill most of them haven't even read? Do we write very serious blog posts about how concerned we are and hope someone is listening?
What do we do if they decide they need 10.6% of our wages because half the country is out of work and the government can't function without jacking up taxes? Do the patriotic thing, and sacrifice our wages for the good of the republic that already flushed our money down the crapper twice?
What the fuck are we supposed to do? We already voted. What else can we do?
We could storm the capitol.
I know that sounds crazy, but should it? Our country was founded by people who were sick of being taxed by a bunch of assholes who didn't give a shit about their well being. At what point should the poor people of this country consider revolt against the rich assholes who don't care about us? Who, in fact, seem much more concerned with keeping us quiet and controlled than making us prosperous.
At what point would you consider buying a rifle?
Some of you are probably thinking, "NEVER! What do you think I am, suicidal? The government has tanks and jeeps and bombs of every size. We've already let the governemnt control an army too powerful for the people of this country to stop it."
That's true, maybe any revolution against a modern government could only end in failure. We are absolutely at the mercy of the governemnt.
Man, forget the rifle, I'm moving to Ireland.
Wednesday, February 18, 2009
Skills listed on applications for a clerical work study position we're looking to fill
Filing
Clerical
Boxing
Communication skills
Cashier
Scuba diving
Pro wrestling for WWE (1 year)
Pro wrestling in Japan (7 year)
Jazz dancing
Team player
Clerical
Boxing
Communication skills
Cashier
Scuba diving
Pro wrestling for WWE (1 year)
Pro wrestling in Japan (7 year)
Jazz dancing
Team player
Sunday, February 15, 2009
I am suffering from an intense desire for cheeseburgers
The caption under the image is the best part.
Who Lives In a Pineapple Under the Sea? ~RICHARD NIXON!~
Yellow and spongy and porous is he. RICHARD NIXON!
I am sans internet at the moment. It seems as though the blog is surviving without me.
In leau of not having the Infinite Distraction Device, I have been animating and drawing like a motherfucker. I realize that this idea that I am working on takes two recognizable characters, mashes them together, and then I throw in my retarded sense of character development and it comes out wonderfully. For example, Carmen San Diego + The Man in the Yellow Hat = God Tier.
Also, in a very bizarre set of circumstances, I had to degrade a girl into friend status. The horror! Do girls find it this easy to write guys off? It is a mystery to me, but I was able to sleep on it and not obsess about it too much.
Oh! There was a debacle with H&R Block. Foolishly (an April Fool, as it were) I went to H&R Block in hopes they would give me money in three days. Have I told this story to the blog before? Fuck it. I have been doing my own taxes since the last time I H&R Cocked back in the days of Jum&Go. So SUPRISE, they didn't approve me for the rapid refund but they were still going to take the fee out of it. Whatever. I was still getting back $700+ so I wasn't going to gripe. So the IRS sends my refund to HSBC, the bank H&R goes through. Despite the fact I have a Mastercard through HSBC and had it the last year or so, HSBC could not verify that I was indeed David Wells of -current address-. So they sent my money back to the IRS, who will send me my money in the form of a check a MONTH after H&R promised it to me. Dicks alive.
And finally, I was reminiscing with someone about Megaman 2. It occurred to me that when I played this game in my youth, I was a real Jew about using the weapons. To be anti-Semetic as described by my character bio, I fired up the old Nester ROM device and played Megaman 2 but instead I was using my weaponry generously. Holy shit cocks. Frivolously throwing away weapons in that game makes it a 100 times better! My new goal is to go through all the other Megaman games with the same lack of courtesy.
I am sans internet at the moment. It seems as though the blog is surviving without me.
In leau of not having the Infinite Distraction Device, I have been animating and drawing like a motherfucker. I realize that this idea that I am working on takes two recognizable characters, mashes them together, and then I throw in my retarded sense of character development and it comes out wonderfully. For example, Carmen San Diego + The Man in the Yellow Hat = God Tier.
Also, in a very bizarre set of circumstances, I had to degrade a girl into friend status. The horror! Do girls find it this easy to write guys off? It is a mystery to me, but I was able to sleep on it and not obsess about it too much.
Oh! There was a debacle with H&R Block. Foolishly (an April Fool, as it were) I went to H&R Block in hopes they would give me money in three days. Have I told this story to the blog before? Fuck it. I have been doing my own taxes since the last time I H&R Cocked back in the days of Jum&Go. So SUPRISE, they didn't approve me for the rapid refund but they were still going to take the fee out of it. Whatever. I was still getting back $700+ so I wasn't going to gripe. So the IRS sends my refund to HSBC, the bank H&R goes through. Despite the fact I have a Mastercard through HSBC and had it the last year or so, HSBC could not verify that I was indeed David Wells of -current address-. So they sent my money back to the IRS, who will send me my money in the form of a check a MONTH after H&R promised it to me. Dicks alive.
And finally, I was reminiscing with someone about Megaman 2. It occurred to me that when I played this game in my youth, I was a real Jew about using the weapons. To be anti-Semetic as described by my character bio, I fired up the old Nester ROM device and played Megaman 2 but instead I was using my weaponry generously. Holy shit cocks. Frivolously throwing away weapons in that game makes it a 100 times better! My new goal is to go through all the other Megaman games with the same lack of courtesy.
Friday, February 13, 2009
Alabama
As some of you (Nick) may know, Sarah and I live in a bizarro neighborhood. It is most like, I would say, the section of Albia in which S. Bonebright's family lives: vaguely rural with the air of houses and businesses nearby. Conceivably tiny horses could graze not a quarter-mile from where I now write this. At the end of our dead-end street is a park and a ranchish house with a yard big enough to host a miniature ren-fair (faire?) in.
Fuck that bullshit about ending with prepositions.
I get off a little bit every time I end with a prepositoin.
Sometimes I run around the neighobrhood in running shoes and oversized gym shorts and feel ridiculous. Already we are ridiculous enough, 26 year-olds in a neighborhood entirely populated by listless teenagre girls and fat and overhaired mid-50s people who drive nice cars and either directly or quietly mock my car and wonder what the fuck we're doing living in a house that is now on the market for $750,000, no shit, with the landlord gone and us living over the garage and me brandishing the garage opener in much the same way as a space pirate might brandish a blaster.
Last Monday I thought I would give up my neighborhood marathon manning for a real gym. On the way home, driving through Ghettoland, Orlando I passed this lame little movie theater, the kind of place that might remind you of the Cinema V but worse. There was a thin light pole blocking my view as I ate my omelet sandwich but still the spelling on the marquis was up and I saw this:
He just [pole]ot that into you. T
This was among other movie titles, but still I fixated on this one. What could it mean? He just shot that into you? Either it was a bizarre porn or a horror film about a deranged doctor who killed by lethal injection. The floating T on the end indicated a sequal (two). What the fuck, one might ask? What the fuck? I asked. And even after realizing the marquis mistake I still wonder, what the fuck? What the fuck, movie theater?
Other movie news: Sarah and I may see Coraline or the Wrestler or both. Thoughts? Objections?
Fuck that bullshit about ending with prepositions.
I get off a little bit every time I end with a prepositoin.
Sometimes I run around the neighobrhood in running shoes and oversized gym shorts and feel ridiculous. Already we are ridiculous enough, 26 year-olds in a neighborhood entirely populated by listless teenagre girls and fat and overhaired mid-50s people who drive nice cars and either directly or quietly mock my car and wonder what the fuck we're doing living in a house that is now on the market for $750,000, no shit, with the landlord gone and us living over the garage and me brandishing the garage opener in much the same way as a space pirate might brandish a blaster.
Last Monday I thought I would give up my neighborhood marathon manning for a real gym. On the way home, driving through Ghettoland, Orlando I passed this lame little movie theater, the kind of place that might remind you of the Cinema V but worse. There was a thin light pole blocking my view as I ate my omelet sandwich but still the spelling on the marquis was up and I saw this:
He just [pole]ot that into you. T
This was among other movie titles, but still I fixated on this one. What could it mean? He just shot that into you? Either it was a bizarre porn or a horror film about a deranged doctor who killed by lethal injection. The floating T on the end indicated a sequal (two). What the fuck, one might ask? What the fuck? I asked. And even after realizing the marquis mistake I still wonder, what the fuck? What the fuck, movie theater?
Other movie news: Sarah and I may see Coraline or the Wrestler or both. Thoughts? Objections?
Wednesday, February 11, 2009
Tuesday, February 10, 2009
Hobbitt is getting married
As I'm sure most of you know, I'm getting married. We've decided to do a justice of the peace ceremony, then have the big church-family-friends ceremony. We don't have an exact date nailed down yet, but it is looking to be around Memorial Day for the JoP ceremony. I'll keep everyone up to date with the details, because I'm pretty sure we'll have the ceremony in DSM.
That's about it for now!
That's about it for now!
Game Jam
UPDATE: You fuckers were all worthless ! ! !
Read this wired article about Game Jam, then come back and tell me how to play the zombie game.
And the clock was ticking like never before. Team A-to-Z wasn't a normal game-design house, spending two years on a new title. They were participants in the crazed, pell-mell Global Game Jam, a festival held a week ago in which teams of geeks were given 48 hours to design videogames from scratch. When they filed into the fourth floor of a building at New York University — one of 54 Game Jam locations worldwide — all they knew is that by Sunday night, they had to have a playable game that took less than five minutes to play (one of the competition's rules).
I tried to download a copy of the zombie game, but you need a Z reader to play it and I tried downloading one of those things . . . well, let's just say I couldn't figure out how to get tab A into slot B.
Could one of you more computer saavy people tell me how I can make the zombie game work?
Read this wired article about Game Jam, then come back and tell me how to play the zombie game.
And the clock was ticking like never before. Team A-to-Z wasn't a normal game-design house, spending two years on a new title. They were participants in the crazed, pell-mell Global Game Jam, a festival held a week ago in which teams of geeks were given 48 hours to design videogames from scratch. When they filed into the fourth floor of a building at New York University — one of 54 Game Jam locations worldwide — all they knew is that by Sunday night, they had to have a playable game that took less than five minutes to play (one of the competition's rules).
I tried to download a copy of the zombie game, but you need a Z reader to play it and I tried downloading one of those things . . . well, let's just say I couldn't figure out how to get tab A into slot B.
Could one of you more computer saavy people tell me how I can make the zombie game work?
Monday, February 09, 2009
Carl Sagan Just Explained the Tunguska Event to me on Cosmos Disc 3
Also, check out this Dead Rising 2 action. Fucks to the yeah!
Contact lenses are for porn
In ten years we could be watching videos in our contact lenses! That is, if we still have eyes. By then we could just have eye/camera/video playback modules installed in our eye sockets.
I also read a story about a flash mob in London that shut down a train station, but I'm too lazy to provide a link to that one. The moral of the story is that we need to organize some flash mobs in our cities. Imagine the look on the faces of all the hobos in the downtown hub when 300 people suddenly arrive and start dancing.
*nsk*nsk*nsk*nsk*nsk*nsk*nsk*nsk*nsk*nsk*nsk*
I also read a story about a flash mob in London that shut down a train station, but I'm too lazy to provide a link to that one. The moral of the story is that we need to organize some flash mobs in our cities. Imagine the look on the faces of all the hobos in the downtown hub when 300 people suddenly arrive and start dancing.
*nsk*nsk*nsk*nsk*nsk*nsk*nsk*nsk*nsk*nsk*nsk*
Sunday, February 08, 2009
Cat Review Number Four -:- OR -:- Not Really a Cat Review
Alternate title considered for this post: Presented for the Approval of the Midnight Society.
Other alternate title considered for this post: I Challenge You to Determine Your Favorite Element of this Photo.
Impetus for this post: This post, with sad news for Kevin and Sarah (and probably others).
Video found from a time when I didn't have to get up at 10 am to go to work:
Photos I've been meaning to post since Friday night, when Sarah transferred to her computer from discs enough ancient photos to fill the internet:
Tim entering a contest he would soon forget about.
Wes doing science with a curious thermometer.
-:-OR-:-
I challenge you to determine your favorite element of this photo.
Other alternate title considered for this post: I Challenge You to Determine Your Favorite Element of this Photo.
Impetus for this post: This post, with sad news for Kevin and Sarah (and probably others).
Video found from a time when I didn't have to get up at 10 am to go to work:
Photos I've been meaning to post since Friday night, when Sarah transferred to her computer from discs enough ancient photos to fill the internet:
Tim entering a contest he would soon forget about.
Wes doing science with a curious thermometer.-:-OR-:-
I challenge you to determine your favorite element of this photo.
Saturday, February 07, 2009
So Leo DeCrappio Hates You All
From the latest on Ain't It Cool News, Leo has a co-star picked out if you haven't been following, that guy who played the youngest character on "3rd Rock from the Sun". So he's going to be playing Tetsuo opposite of Leo's Kaneda in the up coming live action "Akira". I'm happy to see someone with money and is said to be a huge fan go at this project and make it a reality but to buy his way into the part and then get all his Hollywood friends to be in it makes me sad and that this is the only way this movie could ever happen. Suppukus for everybody.
On a side note Tobey Spiderman is going to go at a live action Robotech with his millions. If he plays it serious enough and uses age regression makeup, he could make a decent Rick Hunter. That's one of the main characters for all you blog readers that have never seen Robotech. I'm waiting to see who they want for Min-Mey, the female lead, before I decide to hate it or not.
Speaking of anime movies, who wants to go see the live action Dragon Ball when it comes out. I'm down with some movie and food action if anyone else is in.
On a side note Tobey Spiderman is going to go at a live action Robotech with his millions. If he plays it serious enough and uses age regression makeup, he could make a decent Rick Hunter. That's one of the main characters for all you blog readers that have never seen Robotech. I'm waiting to see who they want for Min-Mey, the female lead, before I decide to hate it or not.
Speaking of anime movies, who wants to go see the live action Dragon Ball when it comes out. I'm down with some movie and food action if anyone else is in.
Wednesday, February 04, 2009
If this happened at a Kum and Go the story would be "Man Robs Convenience Store With Big Curvy Knife."
Tuesday, February 03, 2009
Singularity School
Ray Kurzweil has convinced NASA and Google to fund a "Singularity University" where eggheads will go to figure out how we can avoid a Terminator/Matrix style demise.
I am in favor of this university, in theory, because it could be that their research will help determine what kinds of supertech could be safe, and what kinds could be skynet. But, I am more in favor of loomsmashing.
Because, if the computers are smarter than we are, what makes us think we can outsmart them, even if we have a three year head start? Don't think, just smash.
Yesterday morning I was scanning the radio for something to listen to and I happened to notice that at least three of the morning hosts were discussing Michael Phelps and his bong picture. This is news? No one cares that Obama's entire cabinet forgot to pay their taxes, but by golly we're absolutely livid about Phelps taking a hit.
Wtf?
KEVIN: I got your voicemail, but my phone is currently MIA. I am totally phyched about taking a trip--April, next week, I don't care when. I just want to get out of Des Moines and I'll take any excuse I can find.
I am in favor of this university, in theory, because it could be that their research will help determine what kinds of supertech could be safe, and what kinds could be skynet. But, I am more in favor of loomsmashing.
Because, if the computers are smarter than we are, what makes us think we can outsmart them, even if we have a three year head start? Don't think, just smash.
Yesterday morning I was scanning the radio for something to listen to and I happened to notice that at least three of the morning hosts were discussing Michael Phelps and his bong picture. This is news? No one cares that Obama's entire cabinet forgot to pay their taxes, but by golly we're absolutely livid about Phelps taking a hit.
Wtf?
KEVIN: I got your voicemail, but my phone is currently MIA. I am totally phyched about taking a trip--April, next week, I don't care when. I just want to get out of Des Moines and I'll take any excuse I can find.
